a taste from home

So I left Hermanus, the hostel there really feels like a big frat house, everyone just chills together and hangs out. It was great. Not something I could do forever obviously but it felt nice.

Chatting with Melissa from Montreal, watching movies, cooking and just hanging out with nice people was what I needed after the depression i went through in Cape Town. So feeling great I left for Outdshoorn (something like that), it's a smallish type village where you can do alot of outdoors activities. Somehow though, everything I felt in Cape Town came back. All the sadness about leaving Mad and everyone in it, thinking about my life and having the weirdest thoughts and apprehensions about coming home.

I heard 2 girls talking about Russel Peters....so they can only be Canadian and from the enemy city. At first I just wasn't up for talking to anyone or socializing. Eating Ostrich meat (that's a big thing here) and feeling sorry for myself suited me just right. However, inevitably, we got to talking and chilling by the fireplace. It was nice, they're 2 sisters who have been travelling for the past year and it turns out I'm not alone in how I feel, and of course I knew that but it was still nice to just lounge about and talk it out.

Worried you might ask, worried about what. Everything, doing something like what I just did changes you so you worry about the person you've become and how she'll fit in at home. Will I be that annoying person that says " you know that martini could feed an entire family for 2 days in Mad" or "Some people out there have real problems so shut up". I don't want to be that person at all but it's easy to think that that might happen. I don't want to lose everything I've gained here either and it's scary how much we become a product of our own environment. I don't know it seems like the more you look for answers the more question you find.

I do miss everyone from home and it'll feel great to see you all. You'll just have to find a way not to hate my in the beginning, although this coming visit is just that a visit, short and sweet, we'll see how coming home next Feb will be like.

Love you all
Muah