I’m sorry and I’m only going to bring this up once

Ok I’m a little out of it today and in a bit of an aggressive mood which is probably why I’m going to bring this up. I’m sorry before hand because some of the things I’m going to say are going to sound harsh.

Our kids had a few days off school last week and so we decided to go visit some of them at their homes. I can’t begin to describe some of the conditions which these families live in. Shacks, smell of urine around the house, the kids dressed in rags which have never been washed….Just horrible. Little brothers and sisters starving to death, under developped.....really really hard on the moral.

Inevitably, being in a place where poverty is so omnipresent you feel a certain amount of guilt. Of course it’s not healthy or beneficial to anyone for me to feel guilty about my life back home, but not feeling this way would be abnormal.

I then remembered when I came back from Kenya, where I had met so many families that I wanted to find sponsors for. I came home in the high hopes of finding people who would be interested in helping. To my great disappointment, aside from a few, most people didn't’t care in the least. How could it be I thought? MY FRIENDS, the world’s most amazing people, how could none or hardly none of them care?

So I judged, I judged almost all of you and I’m sorry, but I couldn't’t understand how we can spend 60D a month on a cell phone, 100 for a haircut…and so many other stupidities but almost no one could spare a 20 or 30 to help families which I had actually met and knew needed it? How come, I, who am one of the only ones who has rent to pay, a student loan to reimburse….... no husband or boyfriend to share expenses with, how come I can spare the extra money?

People who say that you don’t want to blindly give to an organization because you don’t know where the money is going… well don’t kid yourself, if you really wanted to do something, anything, you would have found a way, there are people in need in every part of the world even back home.

I am very sensitive to the sufferings of others (including animals which I also get a lot of criticism back home for and it usually comes from people who don’t lift a finger for people in need either) and of course not everyone has had the chance to see poverty first hand as I have so I understand that not everyone feels this need to do something.

Having said all of this, I do have to say that before leaving and when Liz and I did the breast cancer walk, a lot of you were very generous, so I’m not saying that all of us who don’t make it a point to give to charity are bad people or don’t care because when the opportunity arises you all rise up to the occasion.

All I’m saying is this, no one chooses where we are born and as much as we have no merit for having been born into a family which could provide for us emotionally and physically, well there is no blame for the kids who were born here. I am not saying that we should feel guilty for what we have or that we are responsible for the situation which exists here, what I’m saying is that we can all play a small part in making it better.

Please don’t think that I consider myself a saint because I’m giving a few months of my life where I will get a lot more in return than what I could ever really contribute here. Also I know that in the long run I won’t make a difference and it’s on my mind all the time….. How my being here is useless, how helpless I am to change anything…and how I deeply wish I could do more.

What I am hoping is that, maybe, a bit of what I’m doing here will encourage people back home to find a cause which they can contribute to a little. I’m not saying sell your kidneys and corneas to help others, but a little something….red cross, unicef…. In the absence of ideas the salesians in Montreal who can dispatch the funds around the world. So many kids here are alive because of sponsors that I can assure you, here a little goes a long way.

Being here can be hard on the moral and I sometimes get carried away with my thoughts so again I’m sorry for sounding so harsh and so very judgmental, I know I am in no position to judge anyone. All I am saying is that we can all make a small difference.

You are all wonderful people who I love and miss very much.


  1. Hi sweetie *big hugs* I can only imagine how hard it must be to witness such poverty firsthand, not to mention how sensitive I know you are to pain and suffering. And I want to help!
    Do you think perhaps we can match a kid you've met/will meet with one of us? Maybe see if that's possible and friends of yours who are willing and able can be paired up immediately? If it's not through an organization, maybe through you? I have no idea how it might work... But James and I would definitely want to help out in whichever way you think is best. Let me know ^.~ And hang in there! I know that you are gaining so much over there and witnessing so much hardship and may feel helpless in some way, but anyone who meets you over there, even if it's for a split second, is more blessed for it too, I know. You're an angel! =) love you xoxo

  2. Salut Andréea, tu as raison d'être en colère. On a beau dire qu'on comprend mais je ne crois pas qu'on puisse comprendre sans aller là-bas. Mais a plus petite échelle, ici on peut faire notre part. Il s'agit de choisir notre cause, on ne peut pas aider tout le monde... Je vais essayer de faire mon bout de chemin.
    Je suis aussi "Out of it" ici, je souhaiterais être à ta place. Tu as bien choisi ton année. En passant si tu as des billets Air Canada, je te tiendrai au courant. On va probablement être en faillite bientôt, et sans job... on verra, c'est encore un coup de dé. 2009 va être une difficile mais pas aussi difficile qu'à Betafo. On se plaint encore le ventre plein...

    Courage T2, je pense à toi,

    Seb (T1)


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